I loved every single thing about my best friends wedding last weekend. It was small (42 people), it was elegant (restaurant overlooking the river and downtown Pittsburgh), it was simple (less stress).
She was beautiful, of course.
But really, the pièce de résistance was the wedding vows. I read Kristen’s on Friday night which resulted in me crying. I figured that was good, I could get it all out then and be good for the actual wedding.
But try as I might the groom would NOT let me preview his!
So instead, I had to try my best to contain the tears during THE most beautiful wedding vows ever. They were personal and sincere and heartfelt and just, SIGH, beautiful. For those that know the road these two took to get to each other they were even more meaningful.
The line I especially loved?
“I promise to tell the girls they’re pretty when I know they need to hear it.” (She has 2 daughters who are 11 & 8…and a 5 yr old son.)
I tell Mark this all the time, and I think it’s one of THE most important things a dad can do for his daughters.
And when you tell them they are pretty, don’t qualify it with “but it’s what inside that counts“.
Honestly, that’s kind of a downer.
Yes, it’s a true statement, but build that into your daughters at other times. Encourage them as you see them display great character, tell them THEN that it’s the most important thing.
But when your daughter gets a new haircut, or shows you a new outfit, or is dressed up for a date just say, “You look beautiful!”
We girls know that it’s what’s inside that counts. But our human nature wants to hear we’re pretty. There is no getting around that.
No matter that your comments might be seem to be met with indifference (especially in the pre-teen/teen years). Inside her heart will soar with those words. I promise!
If you’re not telling her she’s beautiful, she’ll find a boy who will.
His motives will, no doubt, be different.
Start when they’re young, start now!